Katia Ariel describes Ephraim Finch as a collector of stories. Finch, who worked for the Melbourne Chevra Kadisha (MCK) for three decades, including 25 years as director, was devoted to people’s stories.
“It wasn’t ever just official for him. It was always heartfelt,” Ariel told The AJN when discussing her new book, Ferryman: The Life and Deathwork of Ephraim Finch.
Finch counselled thousands of people and families through the loss of a loved one and Ariel said that he always did it with respect, kindness and above all else, heart.
“He was really devoted to people’s stories,” she said. “He’s so gentle and so grounded, and somehow has this beautiful way of revering death and demystifying it all at once. He really understands sorrow.
“He’s the envoy for their stories and I wanted to be the envoy for his.”
Ariel was approached by her publisher Wild Dingo Press. The team had numerous journals that Finch had filled out throughout his time at the MCK plus various interviews he had done with others in the past. And then, of course, they had Finch himself.
“I wanted his humanity to be the webbing for the stories. He’s just got so much humanity. He’s just like an ocean of humanity” Katia Ariel
While Ariel is a book editor, she had also previously written The Swift Dark Tale, which was longlisted for the Stella Prize. For Catherine Lewis, from Wild Dingo Press, Ariel was the only one who could write Finch’s story.
“Suddenly, it all kind of coalesced like this beautiful jigsaw,” Ariel said. “And before I knew it, we were setting a meeting with Ephraim and the minute I laid eyes on him, I just went, ‘Oh this is going to be amazing.’ I could feel that it was going to be the hardest and the most beautiful thing I would ever do.”
For Ariel, it was important that alongside Finch’s story – of conversion and then taking on the daunting but important task of helping families through the grieving process – the stories Finch collected were shared in the book as well.
“I’m not a historian, I’m not a Holocaust scholar and I wasn’t interested in just recounting these, like chronicling these people’s stories in this kind of academic way,” Ariel shared. “I wanted humanity and I wanted his humanity to be the webbing for the stories. He’s just got so much humanity. He’s just like an ocean of humanity.”
Finch’s life is the front story; the biography of his life. Through it are embedded vignettes featuring the stories of the people Finch helped. Ariel explained that while Finch narrated a lot of the stories directly to her, she fact-checked them against the detailed journals he had collected and then, if possible, the author spoke to the families themselves as well.
“He can’t meet a person without wanting to know their story.” Katia Ariel
“Ephraim would call them and arrange a time and they were always so happy to hear from him. No one ever said no to Ephraim Finch,” Ariel laughed. “They would come and we would sit at the big table in his front room and all of us would talk and he would reminisce with them, and I would ask them some of my own questions and then I’d go home and as quickly as possible, try to convey the sense of what that moment was like, to be with these people.”
Ariel also shared that it was important for her that the families were involved in the process throughout the writing. She didn’t want any family member to open the book and be surprised by what they saw. But, she said, it was incredibly meaningful to sit alongside them as they read the words.
“To see the effect of their beloved person being memorialised on the page, to see them reading that back, that was just the most profound kind of full-circle sensation,” Ariel recalled. “That’s what made everything worth it with this book – all the labour, all the heartache, all the epic focus I had to give to this book was just validated and vindicated by that. Because the book is for them. The book is for all the bereaved people.”
While Ariel hopes readers see the power of ritual, particularly around death and the burial process, she hopes, most of all, that readers see the power of connection and the importance of storytelling – in both directions.
“The importance of telling our story, but also really listening openly to the stories of others,” Ariel explained. “Ephraim is such a model of that. He can’t meet a person without wanting to know their story. He knew how to do all the formal work of caring for people during times of mourning, but there was something else and that was the fact that he just always got right underneath their heart and held it. And that’s because he cared about the whole being.”
As Arnold Zable writes in the book’s foreword, “This is an account of the life-story of a community ferryman, a tale that breaks the heart many times over, yet lifts the spirit. And this is the deepest wonder – a book about death that will inspire all who read it to live a better life.”
Ferryman: The Life and Deathwork of Ephraim Finch is published by Wild Dingo Press, $34.99.
The Melbourne launch for Ferryman is sold out but there is a waitlist, June 12 from 6.30pm. Book tickets.
In Sydney, Katia Ariel will be in conversation with Michaela Kalowski on June 18, 7pm. Book tickets.
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