Five kids, a wild life and zero regrets

I recently turned 34 and on the morning of my birthday I did not have a luxurious sleep in, and I definitely didn’t get to chill while I drank my coffee. Instead, my five kids under the age of eight had me up at 5am like they always do. On the morning of my birthday, our house was loud, slightly feral, and busy as always.

When I was younger, I always imagined having a big family, and when we got married more than ten years ago, my husband and I made a very deliberate decision to build one. We are the same age, we both work full time in professional jobs, and we are raising our large family without family money or intergenerational wealth (ha! I wish!). To say we have bucked the trend of our fellow millennials is probably an understatement.

So why did we do it? In an age where large families have become increasingly unusual, why would we choose to have so many gorgeous, exhausting, funny, messy, glorious children?

Partly because I think raising children, and raising them well, is one of the most meaningful ways to spend a life. But also, I think there is something about a big family that you just cannot really replicate anywhere else.

When there are five children in a house, the idea that the world revolves around you evaporates pretty quickly. Kids from large families learn to wait and think about other people’s needs. Our kids take turns with everything, whether it is who gets the first cuddle before bed or who goes first in a family board game of Settlers of Catan. My kids know that we have to think about others. Sometimes that means sharing your favourite toy with your younger sibling or helping a baby sibling get the last sticky licks of an ice cream.