Cultural shock on public transport

BOBBA RHONA

I HAVE locked my brand new car up in the garage, put on my walking shoes and started catching the train to work. This has nothing to do with the price of petrol nor am I trying to save the planet by decreasing my carbon footprint — I need to get fit for my upcoming overseas trip. I have finally admitted defeat and relinquished my gym membership. I was paying for a service I was not using often enough because, let’s face it, I’m no Jane Fonda, I am just a cuddly Bobba from Melbourne.

A colleague explained how she had started catching public transport so that she could include a walk to and from the bus stop. As I quite like to walk I thought that I could do the same. So, at least three times a week, I walk to the nearest train station (10 minutes), catch the train to the city and then catch a second train to Fairfield where I then walk for 30 minutes to work.

I do the same in reverse in the afternoon so I am walking an hour and 20 minutes at least 3-4 times a week. I feel so virtuous and exhausted! I have not used the Melbourne train system on a regular basis for a long time. In fact the last time I did the trains were the famous ‘red rattlers’. Things have changed on the trains. For a start they are really packed, especially in the afternoon and Flinders Street station is not the only stop in town anymore!

Actually, it is train etiquette where I have noticed the most radical difference. There are now designated seats for passengers with disabilities, one of those being age! Nobody stands up for anyone else, although my daughter had already told me that when she was pregnant and going to work by train, she had to glare at seated passengers and thrust her swollen belly into their faces until she shamed them into giving her their seat.

Most passengers seem to have grown ear plugs that are attached to iPods. I always thought that the reason one used ear plugs was so that no-one else could hear your music. Not on the trains! I am surrounded by doof doof noise from all sides! No wonder young people are going deaf! If the passengers are not listening to the Ipods, snoozing (especially on the 7am train), reading a novel or just staring out the window, they are having very loud conversations on their mobile phones.

What did we do before mobile phones? We waited until we got to the office to ring the cranky supplier or we gave messages to our personal assistants (who were called private secretaries) face-to-face. We also used the public phones (which seemed to have disappeared) to call our partners (who we called husbands or wives) to tell them what time to pick us up from the station.

Occasionally I hear Hebrew being spoken as I am on the ghetto-bound train and, although it is somewhat loud, I smile to myself and imagine I am in Tel Aviv. Yesterday however, it was Arabic being spoken very loudly and I did not appreciate feeling as if I were in Beirut! As winter descends onto Melbourne many passengers sniffle and snuffle all the way into town. I have been tempted on more than occasion to offer the said sniffler a clean tissue and tell them to blow their noses.

But I contain myself, just! The person chewing gum is very lucky I don’t offer them the rubbish bin so that they can throw it out but I remind myself that I am not in a classroom and these strangers are not my students. As for the walking itself, which is my main reason for risking my health (swine flu is prevalent in Melbourne and I am travelling through the northern suburbs) it is invigorating and I think I am feeling fitter, that is when I am not feeling completely tired out from waking at 5.45am in order to be on the train by 6.54am. Only another two months and I will be on the plane and the walking and train travel will have been worth it.